Harry Potter and the Taming of the Shrew
by MapleCountryBeef
Summary: Tom Riddle, a famous director of off-Broadway plays and musicals, has released a heavily anti-feminist "Taming of the Shrew". Professor Dumbledore, with the help of Mrs. McGonagall, has gathered a team of gifted actors to perform the same play with the same script, just with a twist.
Harry looked up from the piece of paper in his hand and glanced at the grand building before him. Flanked by graceful Corinthian pillars, a tall oak door beckoned Harry.

"I think this is the place," he muttered to himself, and sat down on one of the steps, keeping an eye out for Ron, his fellow theater major friend. Settling down, he watched the people walking by the street to occupy himself. Presently, a girl walked up to the steps just like Harry had. Smoothing back her thick, curly hair, she too looked down at a piece of paper in her hand. She pulled the bright crimson scarf she had around her neck off and sat down on the steps next to Harry.

"It's kinda hot today, isn't it?" she remarked to Harry and smiled, "I'm Hermione. Are you here for the play too?" She stuck out a hand at Harry.

Harry grasped her hand and smiled, "Yep. I'm Harry. Are you waiting for someone too?"

"No," she chuckled, "I'm just really nervous. I wanted to wait a bit before going inside. I take it you're waiting for someone?"

"Ah, yes," Harry looked around once again, "My friend, Ron Weasley. He's always late, though."

"Oh, a Weasley?" Hermione shifted her position on the hard steps, "Are the Weasleys a family of actors? There's a girl named Ginny Weasley in my acting method class."

"Ginny? Yeah, I think she's Ron's little sister, I've heard of her but I've never met her. And yes, apparently Weasleys have been acting for generations," Harry snickered.

"Not apparently," a voice popped up from in front of them, "The Weasley family has been on the stage for years. We've only had one cousin who didn't want to act, and that guy became an accountant. No one talks about him anymore."

"Ah, Hermione, meet the world famous Ronald Weasley," Harry stood up, "He's an idiot with a big head who is always late for everything. Oh, he's also a mediocre actor."

The before mentioned Ronald Weasley shook back his scarlet hair and hit Harry with his bag, "Who're you calling an idiot, idiot?" he turned to Hermione and stuck out his hand, "Hi, nice to meet you."

"Pleasure," Hermione stood up and grasped his hand, wrinkling her nose, "You've got a little something here." she motioned to her nose.

Ron rubbed his nose and succeeded in getting more crumbs on his face, "Sorry, I was eating a cookie. Are you here for the play too, Hermione?"

"No, Ron," Harry replied, "She's just sitting here for fun."

"Aw, shut up, Harry," Ron motioned to the doors, "Well, aren't we going in?"

The newly formed trio walked up the stairs to the large oak door, Harry pulled it open and motioned for his friends to go in. Ron and Hermione stepped in, and Harry looked around for a moment, then followed them in.

The inside of the theater was even grander than the outside, with crimson curtains that hung down in graceful ripples of silk and a chandelier of spun glass and gold that lit up brighter than Harry's future.

"Hi," a young man who was walking towards them extended his hand, "I'm Neville, you guys are here for the Professor's play, right?"

"Uh, yeah," Harry spoke up.

"Great," Neville smiled at all of them warmly, "I'm the stage manager. This is my assistant Luna," he motioned to the girl that was standing next to him, with hair so blonde it was white and earrings shaped like radishes.

"The Professor will be here soon, please take a seat now," Neville pointed to the seats around them.

"Oh, wait, you're Harry right?" Luna spoke for the first time as she came over to stand next to Harry.

"Yeah, I am," Harry replied, slightly curious as to why Luna had asked.

"You see that blond guy over there?" Luna motioned to a blond man who was sitting close by them, with a hand under his chin gazing pointedly at his phone screen, "That's Draco, he's the understudy for your role. He doesn't like you very much. I just wanted to give you a heads-up." As if he knew they were talking about him, Draco looked up. He straightened his suit jacket and glared at Harry a bit, then smiled, albeit slightly viciously.

"Alright, then," Harry gazed at the blond man, then turned back to Luna, "Thank you, Luna."

Humming in reply, Luna skipped away from them, causing Neville to chuckle, "Luna's a bit weird, but you know, she means well. And she's a good assistant."

"But is that all she is to you, dear Neville?" A figure walked in through the very doors Harry and his friends had passed through moments before and came to stand next to them, "I have my suspicions about you two." The mysterious figure ran a hand through her scarlet hair, immediately revealing her identity.

"Ha, Ginny, you're late," Neville laughed and patted her on her head, "I've got work to do, bye!" Neville walked away from them, quite fast paced, with a bright smile on his face.

Ginny shook a freckled fist at his back, "I'll get you one day, Neville! Just you wait!" Then she turned to the trio, who were standing quite dumbstruck next to her.

"Oh, hey Hermione, hello Ron. Who's this?" she tugged at the leather jacket she wore over her paint splattered sun dress and gazed at Harry.

"Uh, I'm, uh, Harry. Harry Potter." Harry spluttered a bit.

Ron looked at Harry strangely, then turned to Ginny, "This is my friend Harry, the one I was telling you about?"

"Oh, the acting genius? The one all the teachers adore? Well then, I'm looking forward to seeing you in action, Mr. Potter," with this statement Ginny waved a goodbye and walked over to Draco, clapping him on the shoulder quite loudly and making him fall off his chair with an exclamation of "bloody hell, Weasley!".

"That's your little sister, Ron?" Harry turned to Ron, his cheeks tinted a pale pink, "She sure is something."

"Look, Ron," Hermione chuckled, "I think someone has a crush."

"Aw, does little Harry like my sister?" Ron pulled on Harry's curly black hair playfully.

"Just shut up, guys," Harry punched Ron's shoulder, a bit too hard to be regarded as playful, just as a bearded old man with hair whiter than Luna's climbed on the stage and motioned to everybody gathered around. By now, there were about thirty kids gathered around the stage, most familiar faces and but some, like Hermione and Draco, new to Harry and Ron.

"Welcome, students," the old man spread his hands with a warm smile, "I am Professor Dumbledore and I am the director of our little endeavor. All of you have been chosen for this play after careful consideration and extensive auditions. Now, before we get started, how many of you know who Tom Riddle is?"

"Everyone, duh," Draco got up from his seat, where he had been slouching quite ungracefully, and walked to the front of the theater, "I mean, does anyone not know who he is?"

"Well, then," Dumbledore didn't seem to mind Draco's forwardness, "Does anyone here not know who Tom Riddle is?"

As no one spoke or raised their hands, Dumbledore carried on speaking, "As you all probably know then, Mr. Riddle recently directed and produced "The Taming of a Shrew". To my great dismay, instead of celebrating the humor and sweet romance that takes place in this play, Mr. Riddle expressed views that were detrimental to women's rights. In other words, Mr. Riddle showed everyone that he was, in fact, a meninist or an anti-feminist."

Gasps and whispers broke out in the crowd, and Hermione muttered something rude under her breath.

"Uh, what's a meninist?" Someone in the crowd shouted out.

"Ah, can someone answer that young man's question?" the Professor asked.

Hermione raised her hand confidently, "The term meninist means a man who believes that women have more rights and power in society, and it is men who are being oppressed."

"That is correct, Ms. Granger" Professor Dumbledore smiled at Hermione kindly, "So I, and your teacher Mrs. McGonagall, have picked you talented individuals to be part of our project to show the world just how wrong Mr. Riddle is. If any of you object, you are free to go."

At this, Draco gazed hopefully at Harry, as if to see if Harry would leave the role. Seeing that Harry wasn't budging, Draco let out a dejected sigh and turned back to the Professor.

There were whispers around the room once again, but no one made a motion to leave and Professor Dumbledore smiled even more brightly, "Perfect. Then I will go ahead and announce the plan. We will also be doing "The Taming of the Shrew", however, with a twist. Mr. Longbottom, if you could explain?"

Neville climbed up on the stage to stand next to the Professor and was joined by Luna, "Well, for our play, we will be switching the roles. The female roles will be male, and the male roles will be female. For example, Katherine becomes Kit, a headstrong man and the cause of his mother Baptistia's sorrow. Kit is going to be courted by a beautiful and smart young woman named Patricia, who will tame Kit and make him the perfect husband. Kit will be played by Harry Potter and Patricia will be played by Ginny Weasley."

Neville went on with the rest of the cast list while Harry sat in stunned silence. What had he signed up for? A theater battle with one of the greatest directors ever? A role as a shrew to be tamed by Ginny Weasley? Whatever the case, his parents were going to be thrilled to hear about this. Even though Harry could imagine the teasing he would have to endure from his father James and his friends, both his parents would be supportive, considering Tom Riddle wasn't exactly their favorite person either.

When Neville had finished speaking, silence reigned over the room. Dumbledore stepped forward again, "So what do you all say? Do you want to be part of this play and help bring down Tom Riddle and his misogynistic ways?"

"Yeah, I do," Ginny spoke up, her red hair flaming and a defiant grin on her face.

"Me too," Ron said, just as Harry spoke, "I do too."

There were cries of agreement from around the room, and Dumbledore looked on happily from the stage.

"Well, then," Neville smiled, "Not to be cliché, but let's get this show started!"

It was a week in, and everyone's spirits were falling faster than water levels in California.

"Hey, everyone!" Neville walked up to the group that stood in a corner of the stage. "We thought you could you some encouragement. Have some cookies!"

Luna stretched out a plate of cookies to Harry, who took one and examined it closely. It had a smiley face made of M&M's and black frosting hair and a pair of frosting glasses, "Is this supposed to be me?" he chuckled.

"We made cookies shaped like all of the cast," Luna said and smiled warmly.

"Ho hum," Ginny spoke through a mouthful of cookie, "You and Neville, huh? Making cookies together? Looks like my suspicions have been confirmed."

"I honestly have no idea what you're talking about," Neville said with a smirk, and grabbed Luna's hand, "Come on, there are some more people over there."

"Come on, Ron, show some more emotion in this line."

"I am showing emotion!'

"Show some more emotion, then!"

"It's because of this stupid wig, Hermione. I can't take it seriously."

"Just ignore it, we'll get you a better one before the actual show."

"Hey," Draco walked over to wear Harry had been lounging in a chair, his script hanging half off his lap.

"Oh, hey Draco," Harry sat up and ran a hand through his hair, "What's up?"

"I just wanted to know if you wanted to go over your lines together. I am your understudy, so..." Draco trailed off, "You don't have to if you don't want to." he said abruptly.

"No, no," Harry smiled, "I could use the help, thank you."

Draco took a seat next to Harry, "Shall we start from page one?"

"So, how have the rehearsals been going?" Mrs. McGonagall, retired actress, and teacher of more than half of the students in Professor Dumbledore's play, sipped her tea gracefully and asked.

"They've been going great," Dumbledore chuckled, sipping his own cup of tea, "The kids get along well, my only fear is once this all comes out we might get sued by Mr. Riddle."

"Ah posh," Mrs. McGonagall exclaimed, "It's not like you're using the same script as him or anything, right?" Seeing Dumbledore's expression, she asked again, "Right?"

"Actually, Severus Snape," Dumbledore chuckled again, softly, "Mr. Riddle's scriptwriter, has kindly provided us with the script he wrote for Mr. Riddle. We changed a couple words here and there, but even a child will be able to see the similarities. Ah well, even if we get sued, our play will be the final nail in the coffin for Mr. Riddle."

"Oh, Albus," Mrs. McGonagall sighed as she placed her cup down on the table.

"So are you telling me, that you," Harry pointed at Draco with his french fry, "Are the son of the guy why was Lucentio in Tom Riddle's play?"

"Yes, yes I am," Draco took a sip of his milkshake, "I'm also the son of the woman who was Bianca."

"Wow," Ron bit into his burger, and then, "Hey Harry, pass the Animal Fries."

"Yep," Ginny echoed, "This is some family drama."

Neville spoke up, "And are your parents okay with you helping out with this play, even if you're not in it?"

"Well, they don't know yet," Draco shrugged and then chuckled, "But they'll find out on opening night."

Hermione smiled at Draco, "Well, I'm sure it'll all be okay."

"I think so too," Luna smiled, "In fact, I had a dream yesterday that our play was such a success, someone threw a bucket of manure on Tom Riddle during one of his interviews."

Everyone laughed maniacally.

 **LOS ANGELES CAUGHT IN STORM AS COLLEGE STUDENTS PLAY'S REVIEWS TRUMP TOM RIDDLE**

"The Taming of the Shrew", Shakespeare's age-old play, has been revamped by Professor Albus Dumbledore and his team of college students, with an unforeseen twist. Their play has been a huge success and showcases better reviews than renowned director Tom Riddle's version of the same play. "We just wanted to show how ridiculous Mr. Riddle's views on feminism and women were in general," lead actor Harry Potter said, "We didn't mean anything political. We just wanted to how that meninism has no place in the 21st century."

 **TOM RIDDLE AND MENINIST LEADER VOLDEMORT THE SAME PERSON?**

As more and more people realize the anti-feminist and anti-women views held by Tom Riddle, certain other details have also come to light. There is now a theory that Riddle is also Voldemort, the leader of the Los Angeles based meninist movement, "The Death Eaters".

 **COLLEGE KIDS "TAMING OF THE SHREW" REVEALS THE TRUTH ABOUT TOM RIDDLE**

As theater fans all over the world buzz about the success of "The Taming of the Shrew", social justice activists are buzzing about the sudden fall of Tom Riddle following the release of his play, that was proven to be detrimental to women's rights. We have reached out to Riddle's PR team for comments.

 **CRITICS SAY TOM RIDDLE'S CAREER IS OVER**

We many never again see another Tom Riddle play (thank the Lord) according to critics. Tom Riddle's career is good and over.

 **RENOWNED ACTORS LUCIUS AND NARCISSA MALFOY DENOUNCE TOM RIDDLE**

The actors, though they were part of the original play by Tom Riddle, say that they never really wanted to be a part of it. They said that their son, rising actor Draco Malfoy, was a part of the team Professor Dumbledore organized for the revamped "Taming of the Shrew", and they support him wholeheartedly.

 **TOM RIDDLE AMBUSHED BY BUCKET OF MANURE DURING INTERVIEW**

In a surprising turn of events, Mr. Tom Riddle, who arrived for an interview with us, was ambushed by a bucket of manure when he stepped inside the building. Our surveillance camera tapes for that time have mysteriously gone missing, and there have been no eyewitnesses. This will probably remain one of the greatest unsolved pranks of our time.

* * *

 **This was written for a wattpad contest, and I'm not sure how to feel about it? Anyway, thanks for reading :)**


End file.
